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He Wants You Back
Copyright (c) 2007-2023 Kathy Stafford, All Rights Reserved
Just about every woman out there has experienced a break-up with a man who later wants her back. This is one of the toughest decisions that a woman can make. Sure, he wants you back – but you need to decide if it's something that you want to do. Just because he's calling you and wants the two of you to give the relationship one more chance doesn't mean that it's the right thing to do.
Remember that you broke up for a reason. You need to decide if anything has changed or if the issues have just moved to one side with the passage of time. Let's face it – if nothing's changed, it doesn't make sense to return to the very relationship that you didn't want to be in.
Determine the reasons that the relationship failed – and then determine how things are different, if they are. If he broke up with you, why does he want to come back? If he left you for another woman, why in the world should you go back to him? Maybe you were the one who broke things off – and, if that's the case, why do you want to have things return to the way they were.
Sometimes, we might end a relationship because we thought that we wanted something different, only to find out that we had something good to begin with. If that's the case, there's no reason not to return to the relationship. Sometimes, we might have been unwilling to compromise, but with the passage of time, we might decide that there are worse things than compromise.
If the problem was with him, have there been concrete changes made that you can look at and tell that he's sincere? If he had some bad habits that he has since managed to overcome, you might want to think about how much he might care for you, if he's willing to go to such lengths.
Sometimes, cheating is involved. This is a very sensitive area. Depending upon your own belief structure, you might find it impossible to forgive him. If you believe, in your heart, that you can never trust someone who has cheated on you, then it's probably best that you let the relationship end. Otherwise, you're always going to be wondering if he's cheating on you again, and that's going to put a strain on the relationship that simply can't endure for very long.
On the flip side, if you believe that people make mistakes and that they can be forgiven for those mistakes, you might consider giving the relationship another chance – if you really feel that it's worth it. Sure, you can keep an eye on him to make sure there's no further hanky-panky, but that doesn't mean that you have to keep him under house arrest to make sure nothing else is going on.
Before you make any kind of decision, make sure that you give yourself some time to think things over. You were in a relationship with this person and it didn't work out. Take time to make sure that you're doing what you want to do. Besides, there's nothing wrong with letting him know that you haven't been just sitting around waiting for him to come back. The least you can do is let him sweat a little. If nothing else, it'll make him appreciate you all the more.
Kathy Stafford, Relationship Coach, "I show singles how to get married and couples how to STAY married" Do you want more from your relationship? Go to http://www.dearkathy.com for relationship articles, advice, and programs.
Get Kathy's new book, "Relationship Remorse: Mistakes Women Make When Shopping for a Man." and learn the right way to find a loving and committed life-partner. Order the book at http://www.relationshipremorse.com
Copyright (c) 2007 Kathy Stafford / dearkathy.com. All rights reserved.
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Top-Level Category: Self Improvement Articles || Related Categories: Society Articles
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Distributed: 2007-11-22 |
Word Count: 692 |
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