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How To Get Feedback From Colleagues That Makes Sense

Copyright (c) 2009-2012
(See This Article in its Original Format.)

Okay, you've just written a new website, or a new sales page. Or maybe you've just created a new product or offer. Or even just tried on a new suit.

And you turn to your friend and ask: "Can I get some feedback from you? What do you think?"

So they tell you what they think. They tell you, "It's nice." or "I like it." Or, if they don't like it, you get the laundry list of all the things you need to change, including the color you used around the border that you are actually in love with.

They mean well. They want to help. But, the feedback isn't helpful.

Statisticians and pollsters know what the problem is.

Anyone who has studied statistics or polling knows one thing really well: that the question determines the type, and validity, of the answers you get.

Several years ago, a friend of mine was finishing up her doctoral work in psychiatry. She was working on a research paper that included gathering information from over 100 families through the use of a questionnaire.

How she sweated over that questionnaire! If she got the questions wrong, then her answers wouldn't be statistically valid, and all of her efforts would've been wasted.

Luckily, you aren't conducting scientific research.

And yet, the answers you get are just as important. If you get the wrong feedback on a website or an offer you are making, it could have a big impact on your business.

Your first step, never ask for "feedback."

And that's only the first on the list of 'no-no's'.

Here are the top questions NOT to ask when you need real answers and information from people:

  • Can I get your feedback?

  • What do you think of X?

  • Tell me if you like X?

  • What's wrong with this?

  • What should I change?

  • These are the most common questions asked, but they will not get you what you want. Why not?

    You're making them work too hard.

    These questions are asking for answers. And you don't want answers, not from your friends. No really, you don't.

    I don't mean that your friends don't have good ideas. They do. But, if you ask one of those questions I've listed above, it means they mentally shift into 'expert' mode, and start looking to fix it for you.

    For instance, if you're wanting feedback on your website, you want to know how your average person is going to use it. And most people navigate a website with a certain unconsciousness- they just click and read and click some more.

    But, if you have someone in 'expert' mode, they start scrutinizing every detail intently. You lose their honest, intuitive, first-blush feedback, which is really what you're looking for.

    That kind of honest feedback comes from a place of curiosity and openness. And curiosity is much more associated with questioning, than knowing.

    That's right, ask for questions, not answers.

    An additional benefit that comes with asking for questions means that friends that aren't experts can still contribute. Someone who might go blank when asked for 'feedback' can still come up with questions that can change everything for you.

    So how do you ask for questions?

    Hmmm... perhaps I have an answer for you. Let's keep going:

    Keys to Getting the Right Questions.

    Get clear on what you're needing from them.

    Are you wondering about whether your website is easy to use? Or are you worried that the text is confusing?

    Do you think your price is too high? Or too low?

    If you don't get clear on what you are needing, and why you are needing it, how can you expect to get useful feedback from whomever you ask?

    Ask for questions around that focus.

    If someone asks the right question, you find the answer within, usually. You'll want to them ask questions asking specifically for questions:

  • "When you read my offer, what unanswered questions come up for you?"

  • "When you get to the home page of my website, do you have any questions or frustrations that pop up?"

  • "When you hear the price, do you start wondering about anything?"

  • Ask these kinds of questions, and you'll notice that your audience suddenly starts coming up with all kinds of really useful questions for you.

    Don't worry if it's a little artificial.

    It is. Even asking for questions is going to bring an unnaturally intense scrutiny to the situation. And yet, by asking for questions, you drop that extra burden of trying to find answers. The openness that comes from the questions will engender an entirely different level of conversation with them, and within yourself.

    Whether you are with your business partner, in a staff meeting, in an online forum or community, or just hanging out with friends and colleagues, try asking for their questions. See what they come up with, and write them all down.

    And then take those questions into your heart, and see what answers you discover. I bet you'll be surprised.

    The best to you and your business,

    Mark Silver


    About The Author:
    Mark Silver is the author of Unveiling the Heart of Your Business: How Money, Marketing and Sales can Deepen Your Heart, Heal the World, and Still Add to Your Bottom Line. He has helped hundreds of small business owners around the globe succeed in business without losing their hearts. Get three free chapters of the book online: http://www.heartofbusiness.com

    Follow "The Phantom Writers" on Twitter (@phantomwriters)
    to be notified when new articles are made available.


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