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Meeting a Girl Online
Copyright (c) 2007-2010 Arnold Kligermann
The first question you ask is 'Why would I want to meet a girl online?'
Why try to meet girls online when you can spot a chick you like, approach her, start talking - and actually get a date? Here are some advantages of offline dating, to put it like this:
You see the real girl right away.
You control the situation, no connection failures etc.
You can impress a girl with your appeal instead of typing smileys frantically.
You can touch her, smell her, even kiss her - and get punched by her :)
Even if you get her real photo, it might not give the real picture - offline dating does not have this problem.
Naturally, I'm the offline dating aficionado, but meeting a girl online does have advantages, too:
The web is a perfect place to meet and seduce an unapproachable girl (yet you will have to reach her somehow, find out her email or a chat room).
You don't need to look good and come sober, clean-shaven, smelling of perfume. All you need is an ability to write.
You can meet some girls online which are not likely to talk to guys in real life.
Online pickup techniques basically resemble offline ones.
The primary rule says 'be different'! This is a nightmare for all girls. Enter a chat with a nickname suggesting you're female, and you'll see all men act the same. Everybody will start asking all the same questions, your age, your phone, whether you got a photo etc.
To impress a girl, you have to stand out of the crowd, be interesting, appealing, smart, attentive and positive-minded. Don't you ever ask for her email or photo!
Yes, I realize you don't want to waste time on girls you won't like when you see them. Still you can learn to understand who's there by the way she talks. If she's whimsical, easily insulted, sometimes not too smart, she's probably a model-like beauty. Teenies are naive, sometimes easily scared and silly. Smart, joyful, witty girls almost always got beautiful eyes.
If a girl starts your talk by asking about your work, it means she's not a teenie, she also works or is temporarily unemployed, and most likely she's over 22-24 years of age. If she asks about your studies, she can be younger. You can use a multitude of hints to determine the age of your would-be partner. Try to write in correct spelling. Don't think that writing 'u got a luvly neekneim' will make her jump on you. She might, but you probably won't be too happy with it.
Treat her in a respectful way. Play gentle, because you don't know her age, her personality and her mood. You may as well receive a rude reply, and we don't need that.
So, you are entering this chat room and soon you have a target. Don't start by asking the person about their gender. You'll see that very soon by the way he or she talks to you.
People usually say something like 'hey there', but you should be smart enough to say 'good evening.' Your opening phrases should be witty (no filth), intelligent, nicely written with a bunch of relevant smileys.
Talk about something abstract. The girl should enjoy your communication, not go over her troubles again. Insert questions about her, about her work, hobbies, horoscope stuff, favorite sites, etc.
Finishing your talk, if you like a girl, ask how you can reach her later. She'll decide herself, whether it could be a phone or an email.
I think that men online often lack patience and lose promising contacts. If you get an email, it's an open way to seduction. You can use postcards, emails, poems, links to sites, whatever.
Now let's have a look at those dating sites.
You are running a search, of course, including only profiles with photos and from your location. Here come some profiles, and you feel like falling for some of them. And here comes the stupid part. You write an email and copy-paste it to all the girls. Nonsense!
If your message can be sent to multiple recipients, it means it's a worthless message. For instance:
"Hi. My name is Dan. I saw your profile at IsraLove.co.il and felt something I never did. It may be love! Write to me! Lamer@lamer.com"
What can I say? Really brief, to say the least, and she probably gets dozens of similar emails. What's your difference? How good are your chances? You should always keep asking these questions.
Here are some dating site tips.
A nice message subject. Not 'from your honey bunny' or 'my hard friend wants to meet you'. Something like 'It might be fate' or 'To the prettiest blonde of the town'. Don't be too brief, at least 15 sentences is fine. The upper limit should be reasonable, not two megabytes of pure text, you'll scare her. Be original. Invent a nice beginning which explains things, but don't be too mysterious. Note her features from the profile and mention them in your message.
For example:
Profile: Julia, 22yo, 5'7'', blue eyes, like sea, swimming, discos, study at medical college, like Roxette and Nirvana, looking for a kind, attentive smart guy for messaging and romance.
Your message:
Subject: "To the prettiest girl of the medical college"
Hello, Julia. Sorry if I disturb you. I saw your profile on a dating site. If it wasn't posted by you and it's a joke, please accept my apologies. The thing is that I liked the girl in the pictures very much, I would even go far enough to call you the prettiest girl in your college. I love when a girl has blue eyes, looking like lakes where one can drown. Probably you get compliments very often and I look hackneyed. Let me explain who I am a bit.
My name is Dan. My job is database programming, and I'll be 25 soon. I'm a bit taller than you, 5'11'', I love dancing, discor, and Roxette. Sometimes I think that we men never understand women completely. We have no idea what you really want and we seldom behave the way you would like us to. I know how important attention and response are. I know how important it is to take care of a woman, like a beautiful flower which withers without tenderness and consideration. Okay, don't let me get too started :) If you are interested, we could exchange thoughts and ideas. I'd love to, really.
Thanks and enjoy yourself!
I think you will surely have better chances than all the other men after a message like this.
Good luck to you!
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Arnold Kligermann is autor and webmaster of http://www.seek.fi/ - online dating website, which contains useful dating tips and message examples.
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