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Article Teaser: The circumstances of life and occurrences in the heat of the moment may lead to marriage proposals, without the engagement ring in hand... When my dad asked my husband his intentions with me, my then-boyfriend blurted out a request for marriage... The only problem was...

Keep reading below...

Why A Girl Doesn't Really Need An Engagement Ring

Copyright (c) 2009-2017

My husband and I didn't have an overly romantic proposal scenario. We were discussing the possibility of moving in together, and I informed him that my parents would likely demand to know what his "intentions" were. Being the good sport he is, he agreed to a dinner out with these parents of his only-child girlfriend knowing that this dreaded question would arise. When it did, he responded with the one phrase I'd begged him not to utter:

"Well, Sir. I'd like to make an honest woman out of your daughter." He glanced at my beet-red face, cleared this throat, and clarified, "What I mean is, if you and your wife approve, is that I'd like to marry her." My Dad smiled and shook my (at that point) very shaken boyfriend's hand and said, "We give your our blessings." I looked at my Mom. "You too?" She nodded with tears in her eyes. "Me too," she said.

As we walked to our respective cars, my parents hugged me and told me how happy they were for me. I responded, "Don't get too excited, you guys, he hasn't asked me, yet."

Once my then-boyfriend, now-husband and I were in the car on the way back to our respective apartments, he asked me what I meant by what I said to my parents. I looked at him incredulously. Since he looked genuinely puzzled and not the least malicious, I gently said, "You haven't, at least not technically, asked me yet. Therefore, we are not 'engaged.'" He frowned, then looked a little embarrassed, then said, "Well, I don't have a ring. I want to be engaged to you, but I can't afford to buy you a ring." Frustrated, I said, "You don't have to have a ring to propose to me."

He looked surprised, then confused, and said, "I don't?" "No!" I exclaimed. Then he said, in a not entirely quiet tone of voice, "Well, then do you want to marry me?" "Sure," I said back, with the same amount of not entirely quiet in my voice. "Great," he said, "I'm going to call my mother."

The big question in lights at the ballpark, it wasn't. Down on one knee with romantic music playing in the background and little winged Cupids shooting their love arrows through everyone lucky enough to feast their eyes upon the most romantic proposal ever... it wasn't. But it was how I got engaged, and I wouldn't trade it for anything.

Obviously, the statement I made to my future husband was a little controversial. I honestly didn't even think about it at the time, but I've been informed since then that I should not have, under any circumstances, let my fella off the hook without buying me some sort of engagement ring. I didn't even have to be a BIG diamond, they say. It didn't really need to cost three months salary, they say. You know what I say? I loved this man, he loved me back, and if he wanted to get married to me I certainly wasn't going to make him shell out a bunch of cash for a engagement ring before we could start planning our life together.

Billy Crystal, in the movie When Harry Met Sally, says to Meg Ryan, "When you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with somebody, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible." I wholeheartedly agreed with that sentiment. I told my new fiancĂ(c) that much, and he was awfully glad I felt that way. Of course, he was looking at it from a practical standpoint - the less money we spend on things like that, the more money we can save up for a new vehicle, new house, or something else down the road. I tended to look at it in more romantic terms - and didn't really look at is a big sacrifice. Who needs a diamond? They need cleaning sometimes, the stone can fall out of the setting, you have to insure them... heck, and people have been murdered for the rings on their fingers before. Who needs that kind of hassle? Not me.

So, forgoing the expensive engagement ring, planning and executing a low-budget wedding, and limiting our spending as much as possible paid off. We managed to pay off all our individual debt, send me to grad school, and buy a house. And then? Well, my 5 year anniversary ring is going to be gorgeous.


About The Author: Shop Amazon - Top Gift Ideas
Written by Elizabeth Johnson, a freelance writer for DanforthDiamond.com, a leading authority on wedding ring sets, diamond rings and fine jewelry. Danforth Diamond provides wisdom and advice to help you choose the right ring at the right price. Visit http://www.DanforthDiamond.com/ or call 877.404.RING

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Internal ID: #7198
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