Personality tests are fun to take. These days you can categorize
yourself as a color, an animal, a number, or letters. My
favorite is the Myers-Briggs which has been a helpful tool for me
in making decisions and in dealing with those who are different
from me. When someone tells me they are an ENTJ (1), I have a
real clue about who they are.
My best friend insists that I'm an extrovert, although Myers-
Briggs has labeled me as an introvert. The test proclaims that
one's personality never changes, but after doing a little
research I found that my friend is right. Several studies have
shown than results of this test do vary over time, even during
different times of the day.
My reading also taught me that Carl Jung originated the concept
of personality typing, but he didn't stop there. He also
developed the theory of the 'shadow,' which is that part of
ourselves that we hide because we have personally judged it to be
wrong or bad. (2)
I began to wonder. What don't I understand about personality
types? For that matter, what are we all getting wrong? Is there
a link between the shadow and personality types? Experts have
barely addressed these questions, but I'd like to share some of
my personal insights.
The Shadow
Let's start with explaining the shadow a little better. Our
shadow reflects our self-judgment, not good and evil. For
example, being 'bold and assertive' is not wrong but may terrify
a person dead-set upon being 'polite and nice.' A balanced
person integrates assertiveness his personality, using it at the
appropriate time. Assertiveness is only ugly when it bursts out
on its own as a result of being suppressed by the person
insistent upon being 'nice.'
The Personality Wheel: Shades of the Shadow
Most personality tests have opposites on some sort of a wheel. If
I'm a "Thinker", then the "Feeler" is my shadow. An 'Introvert'
shadow would be an "Extrovert." Becoming more balanced in the
personality wheel is the same as facing my shadow and learning to
integrate what I have always rejected. Let's look at every-day
examples of how we deny our ability to learn and grow:
a.. Some personality test would probably categorize a nice person
as "non-confrontational." Although this would be accurate, it
pre- supposes that he can not learn assertiveness. Limiting
potential like this would be like encouraging a perfectionist to
continue her quest for the impossible. That's sadistic!
a.. Some personality tests give guidelines for how to communicate
with those who are categorized differently. Instead, if we made
an effort to develop our shadow, then our communication skills
with our opposites would be even better. It would be a real
meeting of minds instead of a drive-thru exchange of words.
I recently counseled a client to 'become' more like that one
person at work who drives her crazy. During our discussion she
realized clearly that if she were more up-front and blunt with
this extremely rude person, she would be able to communicate on a
more common ground. Indeed, upon trying it she found a new door
opened in their relationship.
a.. Some employers use personality tests to pigeon-hole their
employees in jobs based upon their specific personalities. For
example, it would seem obvious that the accounting staff should
be analytical and reality-based. But as a CPA, I know this limits
the staff's ability to think outside the box in corporate design
and problem solving situations. True cutting-edge employers
offer training and development programs for their employees to
help them develop their skills, talents and leadership abilities,
which in turn opens up potential for the firm.
An Imperfect Tool
So are personality tests good or bad? I still like the tests.
They're a great aid to self understanding, and a reminder that
not everyone thinks like I do, but they fall short. Labels are
created for everyone around me and I am encouraged to tolerate
others who are different, but I'm not encouraged to grow to
understand their point of view.
Walter Cronkite discussed racial tolerance in his biography, "A
Reporter's Life," and went on to talk about the word 'tolerance."
He said "It would be several more years before I learned that
'tolerance' is a stage of development unacceptably short of total
commitment to undiluted equal rights for all." (3)
Let us look at all of those peculiar personalities that surround
us each day. Let's use our differences as an impetus for our own
personal growth, and to build better relationships with those who
we could probably learn something from.
-------------------------------------------
(1) ENTJ is "Extrovert, Intuitive, Thinking, Feeling,"
categorized by Myers-Briggs.
(2) Experts suspect that Carl Jung was a schizophrenic, and as
such, had a good understanding of the different personalities
that we hold within us. A schizophrenic is a person who's
personalities are so totally un-integrated that they
uncontrollably surface on their own.
(3) For you young pups, Walter Cronkite was the 'god' of the
evening news from it's inception in 1962 until Dan Rather took
over in 1981. I always thought he was the most honest person
on TV.
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