Are you a captive of your past? Or have you released the past 
and liberated yourself from its hold on you? When you refuse 
to allow your history to imprison you, you choose a path of 
self-determination.  Letting go of the past is your personal 
"declaration of independence" from anything in your earlier 
years that could limit your creative potential or prevent you 
from living your best life.

How can you tell if past events are still having a negative 
effect on you today? Here are three signs to look for:

1. Certain situations trigger extreme, out-of-control emotional 
   reactions. It feels as if you go on "auto-pilot" and have 
   little or no control over the way you feel or behave once 
   certain internal buttons have been pushed. For example, Marta 
   trembles with fear at the thought of asserting herself with 
   her boss, who overburdens Marta with an excessive workload. 
   Joe goes into a rage when he believes he is being accused of 
   making an error, however insignificant. Ben is consumed with 
   jealousy when he catches his girlfriend smiling at a stranger.

2. All of the logical solutions and practical approaches to 
   changing your out-of-control reactions have failed. Your head 
   may say "this is ridiculous" but you can't stop yourself from 
   over-reacting with anger, sadness, fear, shame, guilt, or 
   jealousy to a situation that just doesn't merit that kind of 
   emotional energy. 

3. You keep making the same unhealthy choices over and over 
   again. Although you may vow that you are going to set a new 
   course, your default mode is set on self-destruct. You can't 
   seem to keep yourself from repeating the same mistakes-even 
   though you know better. Elizabeth continues to have 
   relationships with married men, despite of years of heartache 
   from other married lovers.  Mark lies to his manager and 
   coworkers, although that behavior led to Mark's dismissal 
   from his last two jobs. 


What can you do if you are under the negative spell of your past? 
Here are some steps you can take which will neutralize the effect 
that the past has on you:

1. Reclaim your power by refusing to think of yourself as a 
   victim. This does not mean you deny the bad things that have 
   happened to you. Rather, it means you embrace your wholeness 
   rather than your brokenness. Everything you have lived has 
   strengthened your psychological immune system. Recognize your 
   capacity to thrive in spite of the hardships that have come 
   your way, and watch your life begin to mirror your more 
   empowered sense of Self.

2. Retire your need to blame anyone-including your self-for 
   your present unhappiness. Blame only weighs you down with 
   unnecessary baggage that inhibits you from moving forward. 
   Release blame and feel yourself lighten up. 

3. Forgive yourself for your mistakes. Everybody makes 
   them-that's how we learn. Stop berating yourself with your 
   so-called failures, and use that extra energy to create the 
   life you desire today.

4. Make peace with your past. If certain unpleasant memories 
   still hold a high degree of emotional charge, let a qualified 
   therapist assist you in healing those wounds to loosen the 
   psychological hold those traumatic episodes have on you.

5. Change the thoughts you entertain about yourself. Monitor 
   your mental landscape to avoid habitual, self-limiting ways 
   of thinking. When you catch yourself engaging in old thought 
   patterns like, "I don't deserve to be happy" or "I'm not good 
   enough," deliberately choose new thoughts that feel better to 
   you. 

6. Stop using your past as a point of comparison to your present 
   and future. No matter what you have lived before, today can 
   be different. Instead of focusing on how your life has been, 
   place your attention on how you want your life to be. Keep 
   your eye on the road ahead rather than the one behind you, 
   and watch your life take you to the places you have dreamed 
   of going! 

As you let go of your past, you free yourself to live the life 
you truly desire. Step into the Now, and discover the unlimited 
potential for joy that awaits you there. 

Eve Delunas, Ph.D., psychotherapist, author, speaker, trainer 
Offers proven strategies to help you rise above your limitations 
and soar. Breaking the Spell of the Past--Book and Guided 
Visualization CD set. Take a FREE QUIZ to find out if you are 
SPELLBOUND by your past. Download a FREE guided meditation to 
relieve stress and feel more peaceful. Sign up for a FREE monthly 
ezine called AWAKENING INNER VISION: RESOURCES FOR ENLIGHTENMENT. 
Go to: http://www.innervisionresources.com 
Write to: mailto:eve@innervisionresources.com